The Elric Bros Third Trip to RAW
by Digimon Emperor X
Summary: The Elrics return to RAW for a third time and more hillarity ensues from insulting signs, to LAYCOOL mishaps, and to Jillian almost killing the crowd with her awful singing. Will Ed get into more trouble than he can handle?


The Elric Bros. Third Trip to RAW

By: DMEX

_Nothing is mine, ya jackasses!_

-Backstage-

_Ed and Al are talking amongst themselves when none other than Sheamus comes in_

Sheamus: 'Ay fellar! Didn't ya read da sign?

Al: What sign?

Ed: I didn't see anything…

Sheamus: Dat one right dere!

**IF YOU CAN'T READ THIS SIGN, YOU'RE NOT TALL AND TOUGH ENOUGH FOR WWE**

Ed (angry): _**WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A PIPSQUEAK? **_

Sheamus: Why don't ya just go back ta Central like a good little boy and maybe I won't decide ta beat ya up.

_Ed starts swearing at Sheamus in Irish while Al drags him out of there_

-RAW Zone-

Justin Roberts: Ladies and Gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to Monday Night RAW; the stars of the _FullMetal Alchemist Movie_; Edward and Alphonse Elric, _**THE FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST!**_

(FMABH blares in the arena as the crowd goes crazy)

King: They're back for a third time! I can't believe it!

Cole: We are LIVE in Encino, California for the one of the longest running shows Monday Night RAW; as Edward Elric and his brother Alphonse Elric make their way to the ring.

King: I don't understand why Ed just doesn't admit the fact he is smaller than everyone else?

Cole: You better hope he doesn't hear you say that. Remember what he did to LAYCOOL? He beat them with an uncooked ham.

King: Well, LAYCOOL brought that upon themselves.

Ed: _**HELLO ENCINO!**_

(crowd cheers)

Ed: We're going to have a great show tonight aren't we Al?

Al: You mean for you to be more trouble than you're worth?

Ed: What the hell? I'm your brother!

Al: Not that kind of worth! I meant your temper-

_You're not enough for me (ooooohh yeah!)_

(Crowd boos and shout insults to LAYCOOL)

Ed (boiling mad): _**WHO THE HELL INVITED THEM!**_

Layla: Ed, I thought you would have learned from last time. But you have the brain size of a squirrel.

_Ed's portrait shows on titantron but it shows a very small brain as squirrel chatter is heard_

Ed (angry): _**DAMMIT! I'M NOT SOME SORT OF TREE RODENT!**_

Michelle: And who can forget about you, Al?

_The titantron has a picture of Al in a room full of sheep_

Ed (angry): _**DAMMIT MY BROTHER ISN'T SOME FARM ANIMAL!**_

Al: That's really sad that you would do something like that.

Layla: Well; at least I'm not some sort of freak giant in armor with a apron on.

Al (sadly): It's not like I asked to be this big…

King: Isn't that something Ed should be asking himself?

Ed (angry, to King): _**DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE!**_

_Ed chases LAYCOOL out with a massive stick of pepperoni_

(crowd cheers)

-Sometime later; Kelly Kelly vs. Jillian Hall-

King: -Hits Jillian with the K2!

Cole: Jillian with a Jackknife Rollup! 1! 2! 3!

(crowd boos)

Justin Roberts: The winner of the match, Jillian!

(Jillian asks for a mic)

Jillian: You know what I'm going to do?

Ed: This can't be good…

Al: Let's hear her out.

Cole: I'm inclined to agree with Ed on this one.

Jillian: I'm going to _**SING!**_

(Crowd boos intensely)

_Just as she's about to start her __**REPULSIVE SINGING**__ (and I mean __**REPLUSIVE**__), Ed throws a mallet at the back of her head. A cartoon-like thud is heard_

Ed (angry): _**DAMMIT JILLAIN! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US ALL?**_

_You think you know me…?_

(crowd has a mixed reaction when Edge comes out)

Edge: So let me get this straight? A State Alchemist like Edward Elric throws a mallet at a WWE Diva and a terrible one at that and earlier chases Layla and Michele McCool with a stick of beef. Then the last they were here, he beats them up with _**A HAM!**_

(crowd cheers)

Ed: They started it-

Edge: You know something, Edward; I got someone that wants to give you a piece of their mind!

Ed: Do your worst!

*: _**EDWARD ELRIC!**_

Ed & Al: _**WINRY!**_

(throws a socket wrench at Ed, the crowd roars into laughter)

Ed (angry): _**DAMMIT WINRY! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!**_

Winry: That was for hitting Jillian with a mallet!

(Winry is yelling profanity at Ed; the way Sarge yells at Beetle Bailey. Meanwhile-)

_Edge is getting that demented look in his eyes_

King: Oh boy… Edge is setting up for that Spear.

Cole: Pay attention Ed!

_Edge rushes_

King: Look out!

_Spears Edward_

Cole: _**SPEAR!**_

King: Onto Edward Elric!

(crowd boos)

_Rushes at Winry_

Cole & King: Look out Winry!

_Randy Orton comes out of the crowd and sucker punches Edge_

(crowd cheers wildly)

King: Randy Orton comes just in time!

(gets into the RKO stance)

Cole: The Viper is coiling!

(Randy Orton gets him with the RKO)

Cole: RKO!

_As soon Ed gets up-_

(gets RKO)

King: RKO!

(Then goes after Al then Winry)

_I hear voices in my head they talk to me they understand they talk to me_

(crowd cheers insanely)

Cole: Everyone gets an RKO tonight!

King: That just goes to show you that no one not even Edward Elric is safe from "The Viper" Randy Orton!

-3 days later, Winry's House-

Granny: I hope you boys learned from that little experience.

Ed: Yeah, watch out for guys like Randy Orton.

Al: And Edge.

Granny: I hope you boys aren't going to RAW anytime soon.

Winry: No way.

Ed: Besides, I'd rather go to Smackdown, than RAW.

Al: Don't get any funny ideas Ed.

(END!)


End file.
